I went to one of the insufferable networking events last night. It’s my fourth one and it’s like being in the Ice Storm without the nookie afterwards. The same dull gathering played over and over. The same jerkass printer’s rep who hassled me about the non-existent jobs I refuse to send him. The rep from the party organizers whose last sober thought was to order another drink. She sold my folks their last car so she thinks we’re buds by association. There is also the one really hot rep from the same organization, but she is actually concerned with doing a good job at the gathering so shenanigans aren’t happening.
They set up tables from about 20 firms, most of which don’t change from the previous gathering. You load up on your swag, fake a little sincerity, have a nosh, and be on your way. Early on, I ran into a kindred spirit who had the same attitude about the gathering, so it was nice to have somebody to partner in the making fun of the other attendees.
This progressive dinner changes venues and last night’s was at Lasertron. The gathering took over one area with the schmoozing, used an anteroom for suprisingly decent food, wings and whatnot. Driving out there, I was seized with visions of account execs in the Laser tag vests shooting each other. I forgot about the other large scale game they play called cyber sport.
You ride the little carts around and use the sawed off lacrosse thingys to shoot on the goals. Once you sit in the little carts, you do indeed feel stupid. It was actually a pretty good time. Learning to drive the cart and checking your dignity at the door made up for a interesting time. I can only imagine what the two actual birthday parties in the place thought of the knuckleheaded adults shooting each other in one room and doing the above in the other. Good thing my innner child doesn’t have an inside voice.
Never drank celebratory beers over two cyber sport wins before.