Deaf Wife

A man feared his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought she might need a hearing aid.

Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem.

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing  loss.

Here’s what you do,” said the Doctor, “stand about 40 feet away from her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you. If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and so on until you get a response.”

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in the den. He says to himself, “I’m about 40 feet away, let’s see what  happens.” Then in a normal tone he asks, ‘Honey, what’s for  dinner?

No response.

So the husband moves closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his wife and repeats, “Honey, what’s for dinner?”

Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his wife and asks, “Honey, what’s for dinner?”

Again he gets no response.

So, he walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. “Honey, what’s for dinner?” Again there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her. “Honey, what’s for dinner?”

(I just love this)

“Joe, for the fifth Fuckin’ time, Chicken!”


Got it started

Glad the Packers won the big game as they haven’t in some time. I don’t possess any particular anti-Pittsburgh feeling, other than sick of hearing about Ben Rothliesberger’s tough year and his season of redemption. Boo-flippin-who.

The Fox announcers seemed to go out of their way to lionize somebody who certainly didn’t merit it. He’s a gifted quarterback to be sure, but that isn’t license for anything including getting loaded at a Dallas karoake bar earlier in the week.

The Packers did make a person worry a little, nearly going to pieces in the third quarter, but they did right themselves which was good. Maybe it was the injuries to their defense, maybe the technical troubles the Black Eyed Peas suffered (Nobody could test the V?), but it seemed to take the Pack a little bit to get back into the game in the second half.

I supposed while the audio mixer for the Peas had the worst night (I mean, did anybody hear any sound from the trumpets on stage or from Usher?), Bud Light seemed to have the best. While all the pre-game buzz was around the deservedly cool Volkwagon-Darth Vader ad, Bud was very clever from the product placement spot to the dogs hosting the party.

If only I drank the stuff…..